I Like to Laugh

So, I've been very depressing, but, this blog is where I vent and I'm going to try to change that. Well, I like to laugh, so, here's some links to videos where my laughter is found.

Enjoy.


By: JacksFilms
Title: Your Editing Lacks Continuity
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rSnCu43QzeY&feature=channel
My Notes: I actually like a lot of JacksFilms, and this one just makes me laugh every time. :)

By: The Hillywood Show
Title: Eclipse Parody
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cue1lwqe7zQ
My Notes: Yeah, I'm the twilight hater, but this video is funny, pokes fun at twilight, and has some pretty freakin' awesome dance moves.

By: Nigahiga
Title: Word of the Day: Bromance
http://www.youtube.com/user/nigahiga#p/u/7/Uv7SUncOAAQ
My Notes: There is a reason Nigahiga is the most subscribed person on youtube.com

By: The Japanese (???)
Title: Funny Japanese Commercial
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MfzNEmqeIWo
My Notes: What the heck are the Japanese trying to sell... and what stratigy are they using that works?!

These are the only ones I can think of off the top of my head, but I will try to break up the angst with more randomness/happiness.

K, thx, bai.

Two Faced

I am tired of all this noise that doesn't do anything but frustrate me.

The noise of girls crying out for a prince without wanting to put any work into finding one. Of guys who can't pull themselves together to face themselves. I am tiered of having people that lean on me, yet having no one to return the favor.

I'm tiered of feeling left behind and useless as my guy friends serve missions. I'm tiered of going through everything alone and being so alone in everything. I smile, I laugh, I make jokes... and sometimes, I just want to drop this stupid mask of giggles and scream, scream, and scream.

I shouldn't have gotten so dependant on people who where never mine to keep anyway.

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"Every angel has a demon,

Every coin has two sides,

And every person chooses,

Which face they show,

and which one they hide."

--J.M. Stetson

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I hate you.

You're fake.

Flawed.

Useless.

You try to make everyone happy,

Yet only cause more pain.

I hate you.

You can only smile,

laugh,

giggle.

It's sickening,

The way you let people see you.

And I hate you.

I hate everything about you.

So flawed.

You don't even know what you want in life.

So happy.

You don't ever frown in any situation.

So fake.

Nobody sees you at your darkest point.

And therefore...

I hate you.

I hate you.

I hate you.

I hate that this reflection,

Shows us what we really are.

Fake.

Flawed.

Useless.

And as I look you in the eyes,

And your eyes look yourself in the eyes,

Tell me...

If you don't like what you see,

Why don't you change us?

The answer always leaves a bitter taste in our mouth.

Because there is nothing else we could fake as well as happiness.

--J.M. Stetson

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Obviously, I just don't like myself, yet can't find another person to be other than what I am. Someone once said, "Don't like your life? Burn it to ashes, start again." How so? With a new job? A new place? I'm not sure...

But I hope to find a way to start again soon.

Empty Screaming

I feel empty... I think now it's setting in that everyone I trusted most is gone, and now I have nobody to lean on.

I wish I could put into words what my heart is screaming at me so harshly.

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"Everyone thinks that I have it all,
But it's so empty living behind these castle walls.
If I should tumble if I should fall,
Would anyone hear me screaming behind these castle walls?
There's no one here at all,
Behind these castle walls. "
-Christina Agulira, Castle Walls

"It's amazing to watch your life burn to ashes in front of your eyes... You don't know whether to cry at the disaster or laugh, for you where the one to set it afire." -Unknown

False Jusdgements and Harsh Critizism

Why do people find it okay to lash out on me when it's a subject they know so very freakin' little of??

Ashley, you don't know EVERYTHING that happened. Yeah, I didn't go to his farewell, but if I wasn't talking to him for over a YEAR, do you really think not talking to him for another two is going to make me go to his farewell??

We're not friends, and from the way he treated me in the past, he never was my friend. He lied, gossiped, called me horrible names, and spread rumors about me that weren't true. Why would I want to go to his farewell? Give me on freakin' good reason.

And Rachael, I don't care if he was an "original Plankwalker"... I don't even understand why you're so "upset" that he's leaving. The only time you talked of Adrian to me was to whine and complain about how he kept hitting on you or making you uncomfortable when you told him to stop. Yet now that he's leaving, it's tragic.

Why can't people see that I'm not mad at him, I just can't be his friend? I want to keep him a stranger and if you can't accept that, than ignore the topic or move on so I don't have to deal with your judging.

Who are you to tell me I'm immature? Who the HECK are you to tell me that I could've "gotten over this" if I didn't hold a grudge?! It's NOT a grudge, it's a mistake I won't make again. I won't be "friends" with someone who throws our "friendship" to the ground for any advantage he sees in it for himself. Don't even tell me how I feel (Rachael) don't tell me I'm being immature (Ashley) and don't even hold a judgement against me. I'm tiered of it and I don't deserve it from friends (Rachael) and I defiantly don't deserve it from mostly strangers. (Ashley)

To end this rant of hurt and spite, I leave you two girls with this:

Screw. You.

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"I choose to keep you in the dark.

I choose to keep this story under wraps.

All I ask is that you keep your false judgements and harsh criticism to yourself on this subject that you know so little of.

I don't show you the light and I don't take off the bandages because I'm mature enough to keep it to myself.

Please be mature enough to shut your mouth."

--J.M. Stetson

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